If I could save time in a bottle,
The first thing that I'd like to do
Is to save every day till eternity passes away,
Just to spend them with you. – Jim Croce (Time in a Bottle)
How often do you want to spend time with someone, but it just passes away? Then you think that you wish you could have saved time and spent more of it with the person then you had. We have all had the experience of knowing someone who has died and during the funeral we regret that we did not spend more time with this person. The saddest stories are those of friends and relatives who have not seen each other for many years and then meet at the passing of a loved one and mourn the time that they lost or did not spend together. If we could only have put that time in a bottle.
One morning I woke up and went out about my daily activities. I came back about 10 AM and Karen was still not up. I went into the bedroom and she was turned over and quite still. I looked closer and she did not appear to be breathing. I was in a near panic and my heart started to race. I gently shook her and then shook her harder. She turned over and asked me what was wrong. I started to cry. I was shaken to my core. I had never thought of her just passing away like that and suddenly the possibility was a reality. Each day now one of my goals is to spend some quality time with Karen. I try to start the day off by asking what I can do for her today or how I can help her. I mark off on my goal chart this activity so that I can remember how important it is.
No matter our best efforts, time just passes away and we never spend the quality time you are hoping to. The problem happens because we are living in the future and not in the present. In the present, time is a gift that we have and we can not save even a single minute. When we live in the future, we are worried about tomorrow and we are not concentating on what we are doing now. Can you imagine having a good love expereince, if you were thinking about your work or what you needed to do later? The more we can put ourselves into the moment, the more we live our lives today. Take each moment, savor it and live it to the fullest.
So who can you spend more time with this week? Who have you been putting off seeing because you had no time? Who would you cause you the most regrets if they died and you had not shared another moment of eternity with them? What is more important today then spending time with them?
The problem is that there are too many people who I would regret not having spent time with if I were to hear that they had suddenly died, plus there are too many other activities that also beckon for my interest and time. To solve that problem, I would have to prioritize people and activities in an explicit way. Although some people are more important to me than others, it feels wrong to rank them into who you love more and who you love less.
ReplyDeleteInstead, I follow the path of least resistance and attend to whoever (or whatever) happens to be in front of me at the moment. It's a sort of living in the present, but not the glorious, totally immersive sort you describe.
I probably shouldn't, but I take comfort in the fact that even Jesus reportedly responded to the sick person in front of him when he presumably could have healed all the sick people everywhere (and for all time to come). His believers claim that that's the point, that he did offer healing to all of us, not so much of physical illness but of spiritual estrangement from God and each other.
Time and life are always a balance Bruce. No matter what I say, the opposite is probably equally true so I am of course only expressing one set of "truths" in these blocks. But is is frustrating to me at times that life is not simpler. Maybe I make it too complex but it does seem like a juggling act to me adn I cannot seem to ever keep all the balls in the air at the same time. I appreciate your perspectives, as you seem to be able to see the "other side" quite clearly. I am sure I often miss the yins and yangs. John
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